Monday, November 30, 2009

Crafty Bitch

O.K , so i was watching ol' Martha
today while I waited for my clothes to dry. As if I don't feel inadequate enuff, she goes into full blown "let's start on our holiday ornaments show".(With that guy from the
twilight movies,) anyway, out comes the glitter. The Martha Stewart brand glitter.
Glitter everywhere, on paper, on seashells, multi patterned, sprinkled, poured,
(mind you CAREFULLY poured over paper so u can reuse it ..) Shit! Glitter flying everywhere, over everybody. Martha telling the guest to NEATLY glue and sprinkle .
Glued with Martha Stewart brand glue. Over a Martha Stewart brand tray, paper cut with
Martha scissors. Martha showed us her Martha glue-gun. I decided they need to make
Martha sanctioned booze to chug when you
totally fuck up the craft project you were trying to be "oh so neat ' about making.

"OH, this unassuming little Martha Chablis? Oh it goes SO well with our
glitter projects. Don't you think so?
Let's have some lovely Aisy Cendre to go with ,eh?"

I'm going to go paint my projects now, and maybe, just maybe if I get buzzed enuff,
I will glitter everything I can see.

No comments: